Archive for September, 2007

Tom Brigade: Jesse Lee Paterson

Posted in Uncategorized on September 22, 2007 by tomwars

Rev. Jesse Lee Patterson, you’re a Tom. You’re a platinum level Uncle Tom, and anyone who attends your sermons and takes you seriously is an Uncle Tom by proxy. Whenever Faux (Fox) News needs their agenda pushed by a black man, they call Patterson in to shuck and jive his way through their news segments. The writers of Tom Wars will meet and assign him his rank at a later date. Until then, enjoy this step and fetch segment Patterson discusses on Faux News about the Jena 6 situation.


OJ and Miss Sophia

Posted in Uncategorized on September 19, 2007 by tomwars

Preface: White people, if you get offended by the use of the word “white folks” in this article, then I’m actually talking about you, and the term was used correctly. If you don’t get offended, you will surely know quite a few white people that I am talking about.


White folks sure know how to hold a grudge. It’s been almost 12 years since OJ Simpson was acquitted of murdering Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman. Since that date, white folks have been trying to find new loopholes in the constitution to find Simpson, and any other Negro guilty of crimes after they’ve been acquitted. Apparently after you’ve been acquitted of murder, you can be taken to civil court for the same “crime” (since it’s civil court, it’s not technically a crime apparently). According to a USAToday article published in 1997, double trials are a very unusual event which only happen during high profile cases involving wealthy defendants. No matter how one tries to rationalize the civil trial, when it gets down to it, Simpson was tried twice for the same crime. The 2nd trial of course was nothing more than a moral victory for white folks; a criminal consolation prize if you will. But in a society that teaches white folks they are champions all the time, they were not about to just accept the lovely parting gift the civil trial provided.

Be honest white America, how many of you would’ve suspended the constitution for a little while on October 3rd, 1995 for another chance to convict O.J. in a criminal court? How many of you to this day, still can’t accept that O.J. was acquitted by a jury of his peers? How many of you STILL can’t accept that there was actually REASONABLE DOUBT in the O.J. case? Quite a few white Americans believe that O.J. was guilty (87%) from what they’ve heard according to an MSNBC poll taken 10 years after the decision.

– SIDENOTE – I wish there was a poll to show how many of these same white folks were just as pissed when the MURDERERS of Amadou Diallo got off after shooting at him 41 times. Were they as distraught when they heard of the MURDER of Sean Bell after he was shot at 50 times? If not, I really care not to hear about their opinions of injustice in America. – SIDENOTE –

The reactions after the verdict came down were astonishing to say the least. White folks showed a range of emotions from being distraught, to just being down right pissed. Damn that Spade for using the laws they set up against them to get acquitted of murders that traditionally only rich white men got away with. It’s been lynching time for 12 years, and white folks have waited patiently. In the brush. Like rhythm less albino lions with penis envy. Waiting. Plotting. Oh so quietly. Knowing eventually, O.J. would fuck up somehow, and they could pounce on his ass. And that’s what happened. His life has been followed more closely than Paris Hilton following a Valtrex delivery van since the day he and Al went cruising in the White Bronco looking for white bitches and the quickest way to end their lives. O.J. should’ve lived out his life in South Beach trying to bang as many young white skanks he could get his hands on (O.J.’s life’s love has been football and white girls. Can’t play football anymore, but drunk young white South Beach smuts will bang his big head ass just so they can go back to their respective colleges and brag). But no, O.J. just had to be O.J. Now, O.J. will be serving the time he avoided in the mid 90s.

Orenthal James, you big head nigga, it’s a wrap for you. There’s no Johnny Cochrane this time. No dream team. White folks got you like they had Miss Sophia. You will definitely be railroaded this time around after beating white folks at their own game. Maybe they’ll be merciful and let you be Michael Vick’s cell mate.